When marriage is 50/50 it begs the question, "who keeps the score?" Fifty, fifty foments unctuous attitudes when one believes they've done their quota. It allows for argument over roles, responsibility and results.
When marriage is biblical with communication over expectations, then those expectations are worked out with love and grace in covenant. Details may be different for each marriage, that's key but not a scorecard. Sometimes one spouse may, by need of meeting the expectation, do more. The other spouse, at times, by need of meeting the expectation, may need to do more. If this is not handled with love, grace, and submission, a scale can be brought in by one or the other. Anytime there is a track record of who is doing more than the other the nature of the marriage has changed to 50/50.
There is not one marriage, when selfishness comes in that won't attempt to "balance" the work load and suspicion enters the doors of the heart, followed by resentment.
The 50/50 simply out of necessity destroys a loving caring relationship and turns it to competition. The 50/50 marriage finds each spouse questioning each other’s motives when the agreement is not met. Loving actively, and taking care of needs as they are seen has the most possibility of success because it's not lived out on a scale. It doesn’t mean free-reign. There has to be conversations over how the marriage will function and who might be better at doing what. The difference is there is grace when an expectation isn’t met because expectations are held loosely, understanding has a deeper hold. Knowing that you each have one another’s backs, not a scale offers freedom to love without suspicion.
Love, Grace and Submission all the strength of a biblical marriage is different than a 50/50 worldly oriented marriage. The latter is selfishly bent on human's desire to balance the scales. Scales will never balance someone will always do more. Love looks to out do the other and grace steps in when feelings get out of balance. It offers understanding that only good was meant when misunderstandings come in. That’s a marriage that will be strong and last til death do we part.
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