The book of Samuel opens up right away to a battle between two women. That is a blog of its own. I know women reading this can concur. One of the things to point out here is that polygamy was not God's plan. We can not read a story where polygamy was a rewarding lifestyle. God prescribes marriage in Genesis 1&2, and Jesus affirms it in Matthew 19. God warned those who'd rule over His people against plural marriages, Deuteronomy 17:14-20. Simply ready, stories of polygamy connected to God's people describe their lives but not God's sanction of their lifestyle. God protected Leah, an unloved or not preferred wife, against what would have been a shame on top of the loveless relationship by giving her children, Genesis 29:31, while not opening the womb of the wife that was loved deeply.
That was a simple preamble for those who will read the book of 1 Samuel and wonder how did I jump from polygamy to parenting. Parenting is the topic of this devotion. There is a responsibility Dad's and Mom's have to God when he blesses them with children. In Malachi 2:15 God is being asked, "what does the One God seek? Godly offspring," is His answer. Israel was instructed to keep his commandments and statues so they and their children will fear the LORD and prolong their lives in the land they are being gifted. The adults are commanded to keep HIs Word on their hearts and to diligently teach them and speak of them to their children at home, and when they are on the road and lie down and get up. This was integral to them knowing their God and becoming the answer to God's desire for Godly offspring.
Now this was not a promise that the children would walk according to what they've been taught. We see the irregularity of outcomes throughout Scripture. If you read through Judah's Kings you will see those Kings who loved the LORD and were faithful whose sons were not, and the opposite is also true. God wanted Israel to commit to Him and commit their children to Him because they'd see the difference in His goodness, justice, righteousness and faithfulness and want to be His godly offspring. Many saw and still rejected Him. Some did not see this exemplified in their parents and yet came became godly offspring on their own.
At the beginning of 1 Samuel we read of Eli the priest. Those familiar with the story of Eli know what happened with and to his sons. To be specific Scripture refers to the sons as worthless. "They did not know the LORD." Their actions were dishonoring to God when they received the sacrifices from the people. These men would die for their behavior, these are sons Eli raised. What we forget is Eli also raised the boy Samuel. In 1 Samuel 2 Eli asks the worthless sons, "Why do you do such things?" He was hearing of the evil dealings of his grown sons. The passage tells us "but they would not listen to the voice of their father." Though we know God had a plan to put these men to death. It was their choice to continue to sin against God that brought the consequences. The passage goes on to describe "the boy Samuel," who was also raised in Eli's home, he "continued to grow both in stature and in favor with the LORD and also with man."
Here is insight into how God saw Eli's parenting of the two sons, "you scorn my sacrifices and my offerings that I commanded for my dwelling, and honor your sons above me by fattening yourselves on the choicest parts of every offering of my peole Israel." Yet, with Samuel we read a different interaction. Samuel would encounter God in the night. God called Samuel and he did not know it was the LORD so he went to Eli thinking it was he who called. After a couple times, "Eli precieved that the LORD was calling the boy." The same man who parented the two who'd become worthless sons was the same man who'd help Samuel understand it was The LORD who was calling Samuel.
While we must remember that God was purposing and planning to remove Eli, his sons and his lineage from the priesthood he still was responsible for his parenting trouble. This was not because God just nixed them from this position. He says, "I am about to punish his house forever, for the iniquity that he knew, because his sons were blasphemening God and he did not restrain them." They were responsible for this action and Eli was responsible for his inaction. Even though Eli addressed his sons, he did nothing to deter them from their behavior. This same man also help the boy Samuel, growing up in his presence, to understand the LORD. That brought forth a different outcome.
It appears from Eli's questioning of the two sons, Hophni and Phinehas, their hearts were far away from the LORD, but God still had an expectation for Eli to restrain them. Here is the key for godly parenting, it isn't if your children sin against the LORD that you are responsible for their choices. It is how you deal with them in their actions if they remain under you care, in your home, or boast of their sin before you. Parents are not responsible for their children's behavior, that isn't what gets us in trouble before God. It is if we know and "honor your sons above me" says the LORD; and in that our trouble begins.
Eli had a parenting treasure as well, he turned Samuel over to God when he perceived the LORD was calling him. After God spoke to Samuel, Eli demanded to know what was said. The report was not a good report for Eli, but he resigned himself before Samuel and God by saying, "It is the LORD. Let him do what seems good to him." That too was a treasured lesson for Samuel. He would not hear complaining from Eli, no anger, not bitterness, but submission. I'd say there was humility in his submission. That would be how I read those words.
God's Word tells us He desires godly offspring. Those godly offspring should come from those of us who walk with the LORD. Though this is not how it always comes to be. We do not read how these two worthless sons became the way they were. We only know that Eli did not restrain them from their actions against God and the people. I don't think that was taught or exemplified by their father or I believe God's Word would tell us. Children do not always follow parents who may do all the LORD wants for them in their parenting. Yet, they continue to have a responsibility to righteousness unto the LORD in admonishing children who walk against the ways of the LORD. God did not hold Eli accountable for the actions of his sons. He did hold him accountable for not rebuking their behavior and standing for righteousness. He did not restrain them.
We don't offer Eli credit for the example he set for Samuel. He could have despised Samuel but instead the Word tells us, "Samuel grew, and the LORD was with him." That growing was in the presence of Eli the priest. Samuel was a treasure of Eli's parenting. Sadly we remember Eli's story more for the trouble of his parenting with his worthless sons.
One of the lessons this story should admonish in everyone who are currently parenting is this, you cannot "honor your sons (children) above me (The LORD)." This does not mean you are responsible for your children's choices, but you are for how you respond to them. This is if they are still abiding in your household. To honor them over God is asking for trouble. To put God first, is a sacrifice that is truly at times painful. It may mean losing a relationship with your children. The hope for godly parenting is for our children to honor God so we can exhale and honor our children and their choices, that's the treasure of raising godly offspring to our LORD. I'm sure that was Samuel for Eli while he still lived, which was not too much longer. Before Eli died, he knew of the LORD revealing himself to Samuel and he was aware of Samuel being established as prophet of the LORD.
May I say something to each of us? If our children rise up for the LORD, while you offered them the path and established a life before them to give God his offspring, those children still had to choose that path. They are not followers of God because you are. They are followers of God because of their choosing Him, like you did. We don't make our children disciples of Jesus. Remember, worthless sons, and God's prophet came from the same household. That is the trouble and treasure of parenting, even parenting unto the LORD. We can desire to raise our children to become godly offspring. They may choose something contrary to how we raise them. God still holds us accountable for continuing to put Him before the children who go their own way. We pray for them, continue to speak truth to them, and stand against choices that are contrary to who are God is. That is not easy, but it is a Kingdom reality.
There is an agony in the godly parenting process. God gives us his direction on raising children, loving him, obeying him and teaching him to our children when we walk with them, when they lie down, rise up, basically all the time. He wants us to live fearing and honoring him and yet our children may choose differently than what was lived out in front of them. If that should happen, our hope and faithfulness continues with the LORD. He knows how the rejection of children feels. Good parents, raise their children for the LORD. Godly parents, raise their children for the LORD and trust God no matter the outcome of those children. If those children despise the LORD, those godly parents continue to put God first, no matter what. They will never be rebuked like Eli with the words, "you did not restrain them, but honored them above me." No, in fact through some of the toughest experiences of having children, putting your heart and soul into them and they grow up to despise the LORD, there iIs no pain like that. You keeping your eyes on Jesus through that I promise you will hear, "Well done, my good and faithful servant." Remember, God knows the toughest rejection of children turning their backs on their parents. Parents who wanted nothing more than to offer them true and eternal life in the God they live to obey. Read Genesis 3 and God's story of being a rejected parent begins. Yet, his commitment to His character is consistent, so should the commitment to godly character remain for those who are godly parenting. Parenting like every other relationship has its troubles and treasures. Each, we give to the LORD, and keep Him first.
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